Merry-Cherry, International Dating Site

Member Login

09-19-17  Two important things you should know about relationship with your Ukrainian Women
Why are there a lot of misunderstandings, quarrels and unpleasant conversations in a relationship with your russian bride? We were not taught relationships, and we tried everything by trial and error, focusing on movies, books, magazines and friends' advice. In the new relationship, we avoid old mistakes, but we make new ones that are no less destructive. But the fact is that the main problem is one. This is the clash of a different approach to love and relationship.

There are basically two main views on the relationship: merging and intimacy. What is the point? If at least one considers merging a good option for love, everything falls apart.

Merging is when lovers perceive themselves as "we". The couple has common desires and purposes. This applies to absolutely everything. We want to go for a walk, we want to go to parents, we want to go to Europe, we save for the car or we put it off for the apartment. The couple is trying to become so close that two personalities merge into one with common desires and needs.

But people are different and they all have different needs. Then everyone in the pair begins to manipulate the second to achieve his own. "Do it, otherwise, you do not love me". Manipulations and ultimatums are a common thing in such relations.
There is no room for difference in the merging of the pair. Any difference is perceived as a threat to relations and the beginning of parting. Fusion is the fear of loneliness when a person finds himself and the whole meaning in the second person. A person is unhappy and tries to become happy with the help of another partner, but this does not work.

Intimacy differs from merging. In such a relationship, everyone understands that they are different. Differences do not repel but bring together. It is quite normal that you are different and complement each other.

In the intimacy, the lovers are trying to agree and make mutual concessions. Everyone declares his needs and desires openly. This applies to everyday life, sex and everything else.

In the intimacy, everyone is happy and self-sufficient. But together they double their happiness. It is a free choice to get closer despite differences.

<< Back